Mind & Spirit Transformation

Lost in the Space of Abnormal – Lay a Course

During the onset of the pandemic stay-at-home mandate, it was imperative for me to be productive around the house. To not wallow in the worldwide unprecedented conditions I decided to do one of the things people rarely or EVER want to do . . . clean out and take inventory of the pantry and household supplies.

Clipboard in hand, the digging into cupboards began. Talk about lonely, boring work.

If only my daughter were still a young girl living at home. We’d have turned this into an adventure. Just like those migraine commercials where playtime becomes magical and the imagination soars.

We would have pretended to be lost in space. Intergalactic travelers stranded on a planet, its air contaminated by noxious gas.

We’d have to take stock. Make an inventory of our supplies. Rationing may be a possibility until necessary repairs to the ship were made and we could make our escape.

Canned foods – check

Baking products – check

Cleaning products – check

Toilet paper – uh oh

Before you could say, “Danger, Will Robinson,” the game ended.

I was transported back to reality. Returned to an unrecognizable earth where the hottest commodity was TP. Yes, I went there. The classic demand “take me to your leader” popped in my head with visions of porcelain thrones.

After that flash of humor, my mind went numb. I could not process the magnitude of the world situation.

Normal had vaporized and collectively we were lost in the space of abnormal.

People aren’t meant to be drifting in space, off course, and lost. So, the internet exploded with tips and suggestions on how to process this new abnormal. I used many of those tips; as well as trusting in and conversing with the CEO of the Universe.

The CEO of the Universe reminded me that I wasn’t lost; I’d forgotten to hope and focus on looking for the good. I had to stop looking back. Hope encourages us to look ahead and lay a course for new destinations. Hope takes action.

Our ancestors were affected by plagues, a 1918 flu pandemic, World War I and II, the Great Depression, and countless other crises. Abnormal has been the human experience from the beginning of recorded history.

What we think is a choice.

Behavior is a choice.

Choice cast us out of the garden and into a flawed world. Despite the flaws, humanity always chose to look ahead. Take inventory. Discover what led us to crisis; what we could learn.

We can choose to focus on action and what we need to do differently. Entrepreneurs will choose to rise from the ashes and begin again. People will become creative and thrive.

Today, information and suggestions are increasingly posted for business owners and executives to take inventory, plan for future crises, identify what needs to be done, and what an emerging “new normal” looks like within a company. The CDC has a “Resuming Business TOOLKIT” available as a starting point.

As an employee who has worked for decades within various types of companies in multiple positions, here’s what I would ask decision makers to consider:

Add Non-Management Employees to the Team
Whether a leader of a small business or large corporation, you’re probably going to establish a team to oversee the planning and creation of a new normal. Non-management employees:

can bring a different perspective to the table;

can be more informed about particular challenges employees face;

have valuable insight as to what does and does not work within positions, and;

because they were part of the conversation, can be your greatest ally and advocate when launching new policies or procedures.

Sell the Sizzle, Not the Steak, and Educate
If you want to get people on board a new normal, sell the sizzle. This sales technique has been around since the 1920’s. It’s used every day by savvy marketing specialists. Apple, Coca Cola, Pepsi, alcohol and cosmetics companies are masters at selling the benefits, the lifestyle potential, as a result of using their products.

I can only imagine the impact if the aforementioned marketing wizards assisted the CDC and WHO with creating some of their messaging materials.

Use illustrations, graphics, images, and videos that express ideas and clarify the benefits of new policies and procedures. Especially when it comes to health awareness. What do employees gain? People always ask themselves consciously or unconsciously, “What’s in it for me?” Show them. Show them why self care is imperative to the strength of the company and their community.

I want to feel safe in the workplace, as do other employees. Educate us. Explain the why behind new processes and procedures. Information is so fluid right now; make sure you’re sharing and posting current local, state, and federal guidelines. Communicate with us. Give us a voice and a safe place to share our concerns.

Don’t open your company up to a lawsuit. If you don’t have a Human Resource department, hire a reputable HR consultant or firm, like the Human Resource Connection, Ltd., to make sure your new policies and procedures are well documented, equitable, and up-to-date with the ever-changing employment laws.

Inspire When you Hire
The wisest question every one of us can ask ourselves is, “Who do I want to be?” Each of us, employer or employee, are leaders. Our spirit reflects what flows from within us. What we do affects and influences family, friends, coworkers, acquaintances, and strangers. There’s a reason why the movie It’s a Wonderful Life is still popular after decades. We live with its theme every day.

Inspire people. Promote and show new hires and employees that you and your company’s behavior and culture inspires by:

radiating positivity;

trusting employees;

giving everyone individual attention, praise, and feedback during the entire year; not just during an annual review;

brightening the workplace (and remote worker’s communications) with color or nature murals, superhero images, and inspirational quotes, and;

mirroring Twitter CEO, Jack Dorsey.

According to NBC news, for Twitter employees, “who are in a role and situation that enables them to work from home and they want to continue to do so forever, we will make that happen.”

If employees choose to return to the mother ship, they will be welcomed with open arms.

Let’s stop being lost. Lay a course and, “Engage.”

© 2013 – 2020 Susan C. Fix All Rights Reserved

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Write an Abundance Check on the New Moon

Are you on a personal transformation journey? Does it include being open and receptive to more abundance and wealth in your life?

The definition of abundance doesn’t always pertain to money. It could mean improving relationships, discovering your life’s purpose and the richness it brings to your spirit and soul, increasing confidence and the use of your gifts and talents, freshening your skills, and much more.

Writing an abundance check to the self is a popular visualization tool for creating more abundance in life. When visualizing, remember to experience the emotion you will feel when having your desire fulfilled.

Why write it on the new moon?

Hand writing a list of wishes, hopes, dreams, and goals on the date of the new moon uses its energy to set an intention, create a vision, and intensify manifestation.

I first heard of writing a new moon list in Wyoming in the 1980’s. Decades later, still find myself amazed at how many items “show up” from each month’s list. Some arrive quickly, while others seem to take their own sweet time in the land of “no way, not yet, just keeping waiting.”

February 8, 2016 is this month’s new moon. Writing an abundance check on the new moon will boost its energy. If you believe that kind of stuff is “nonsense,” then at least try writing the check on any date you choose – there are hundreds of success stories out there, including actor Jim Carrey’s.

Here’s the video of Jim Carrey on Oprah describing the ten million dollar check he wrote to himself.

How do you write an abundance check to yourself? Here are seven steps:

Use a blank check or create one, just make it as realistic as possible.
Write a future date that you expect to receive the abundance.
Make the check payable to you.
Specify the amount you want – any amount – from just wanting to make ends meet or super-sizing it to make a dream come true.
The memo section can be left blank or be specific on what you are doing to receive the amount. Remember to avoid negative wording or wording that could be misconstrued into a negative.
Sign the check The Universe, Law of Attraction, God, Divine Intelligence, anything that you believe is the force and has power to bring it to you.
Look at it every day, several times a day

You are welcome to copy the check I created for my own use. Used the key and lock to symbolize the Universe’s and my energy as the key to unlocking:

success and prosperity.
unlimited abundance.
the ability to focus on my dreams and goals.
any doors that hold me back.
knowledge and training needed to move forward.

NewMoonCheck.com is a fun site with samples of abundance checks, instructions and in-depth astrology information.

Now go write that check!

I’ll be reviewing other “transformation” tools in future posts. Please share in comments if you have written abundance checks (and the results) or leave a comment below. Thank you!

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to personal transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Crayons & Coloring Pages in the Break Room?

Do you remember the first time you opened a box of 64 color Crayola® crayons? Oh boy! A world of adventure and possibilities arose with the aroma of colored wax.

Adults have rediscovered the wonder of coloring and its therapeutic benefits. Coloring books for adults flew off the shelves Christmas 2015 and topped Amazon’s bestseller lists. I popped in to Michael’s in Sparks last week to find the poster size adult coloring pages sold out.

Erik Wahl, graffiti artist, bestselling author of “Unthink: Rediscover Your Creative Genius,” and one of the most sought-after corporate key-note speakers states on his Facebook page and in his talks, “Research has shown that the smell of crayola crayons can reduce blood pressure in adults downwards 10 points. Feeling anxious? Take a drag of crayola and relax.”

Several years ago, after viewing an Erik Wahl video, I gave mini packets of crayons to my co-workers with instructions to sniff when stressed. It was amazing to see people’s eyes light up and exclaim with joy, “I remember these, I love the smell!”

I have a small packet of crayons at my desk as a “mindfulness” tool. Reminding me to stop and breathe deeply for a few minutes. Be in the moment. Observe thoughts and feelings without judging them good or bad. Simply notice them and let go. Some experiences are pleasant and some unpleasant. Accept whatever arises, let it pass through and cease to exist. Emotionally I don’t react and my mind becomes calm.

Yes, for fun and relaxation, put boxes of crayons, color pencils and coloring pages in the company’s break room for staff to enjoy. A few minutes coloring breaks up the day and encourages people to relax, refresh, and recharge.

Dover Publications offers a variety of books, as does Michael’s and Sam’s Club. Google free adult coloring pages for hundreds of downloads, Pinterest is chocked full of pages, and of course, Crayola® offers free coloring pages.

Click here to check out a 1903 pack of Crayola crayons part of the Smithsonian Institution’s National Museum of American History.

Men can enjoy the benefits of coloring too. Nature scenes, abstract designs, cars, and historical pages are well-liked. If at first you find it uncomfortable, sit with your kids and participate in family “coloring night.” Next thing you know, crayons and color books will be a common sight in the man cave as you and your buddies pop a cool one.

Whether you are choosing to color the sky Robin’s Egg Blue or Plum Purple or shades of both, remember it’s okay to color outside the lines. Happy coloring!

This is a personal blog and all the products reviewed in the above blog were purchased by me and are available to the general public.

I did not receive any free products, monetary compensation, or any type of payment for reviewing the products. Reviews represent my opinions based on personal use and are not influenced by anyone or any entity.

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to personal transformation and reinvention and managing anxiety. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Enhance Your Calm

Everyone gets anxious at one time or another. Being mindful (aware and focusing attention on the present moment with acceptance – without judgment) has been effective in relieving stress, lowering blood pressure, and enhancing a person’s well-being.

Mindfulness techniques helps me maintain my composure in the course of a hectic day, during meetings, and while participating in public speaking engagements.

Give yourself permission to take a breather and refresh yourself by using a tool like Calm.com.

Download the app or use a computer, iPad, or tablet. Access from a computer offers twenty-five serenely beautiful scenes with music or sounds of nature audio you can use while doing deep breathing.

You can also choose audio guided relaxation meditations lasting in ranges from two to twenty minutes.

Here’s to a calmer 2016 – Cheers!

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Mind the Skills Gap – Bowie & Rickman Masters of Reinvention

This week we lost two highly skilled and talented geniuses, David Bowie and Alan Rickman.

With my mind and heart still reeling over the loss of these entertainment industry greats, I’m drawn to the answer of why they continued to be relevant after working decades in their careers.

They were masters of their crafts.

They never “settled;” they constantly reinvented themselves.

To thrive and not just survive, we can follow their leads and go after the skills needed to improve and reinvent our lives.

Working as an employment recruiter, I frequently read about “minding the skills gap.” Whether addressing soft skills or hard skills, most articles directed the burden of solutions toward senior executives, human resource professionals and community leaders.

The skills gap is an enormous issue that is deeply affecting America and needs to be addressed, however, in this blog I propose that individuals take responsibility for minding “their” skills gap.

Ask yourself:

What skills do I need to get one step closer to my dream? To get a promotion? To increase my production? To have better relationships with family and coworkers?

What skills do I need to communicate more effectively? What leadership or management skills are missing? What behavioral skills are lacking?

Be open and willing to learn, not because someone told you to, because you are self-motivated and want to take yourself to the next level.

Here are five strategies for improvement that “reinventers” can use.

WHAT “ROLE” DO YOU SERVE?

You can’t know where you’re going, what skill(s) are missing or lacking, and how to improve if you don’t know where you are.

How to assess yourself honestly, accompanied by the willingness to be taught, is a valuable skill that lasts a lifetime.

There are tons of self-assessment tools in books, magazines and online, including Tony Robbins, “Wheel of Life.”

If literacy is an issue (you can’t answer the questions if you can’t read them) ask a trusted friend or family member to help you. Don’t let them answer for you – answer from your own heart and mind.

Take time to evaluate the function and responsibility you serve in all areas of your life.

Focus only on yourself. This isn’t the time to think globally (other people’s issues or America’s issues.)

Are you happy in the role(s) you’ve taken on?
Does that role lift you up or drain your energy?
Is that role bringing you success?
Where are you struggling?
Are technological advances overwhelming you?
Where are you not keeping up, or not working at your highest capacity, or as efficiently as you know you could if you had the right skills training?

Once you recognize and pinpoint frustration or the areas you could develop, take steps to improve and empower yourself. You can:

Train with a career coach.
Train with a spiritual coach.
Work with a financial advisor.
Hire a personal trainer.
Work with a literacy counselor.
Meet with your supervisor, manager, or owner of the company and ask about training. Come to the meeting with some suggestions and solutions for skills training, such as employee cross-training and mentoring.
Read books or listen to audio books on skills training related to your improvement topics.
See a therapist or psychologist – they can help sort out self-defeating thoughts and bring awareness to issues that are holding you back and you don’t even know it.
Use the Internet to research ways to acquire your desired skill training. Blend e-learning with face-to-face learning.
Ask for and thank the Divine for guidance.

CARRY YOUR “SCRIPT” & REHEARSE IT DAILY

Your “script” is your skill training goal with an action plan.

Write your goal(s) down by hand. Carry it with you. All the time. Everywhere.

Read your goal(s) every morning and every night preceded by the words “I am” or “I am willing to believe I am.”

Write an action plan on how you are going to achieve the skills training. If you don’t know how, ask a trusted friend, coach, or advisor. Ask the social media connections you’ve worked so hard to build relationships with if they or someone they know has advice.

To keep you motivated, remember to visualize (and write down) what you will achieve by getting skill training.

TAKE CLASSES ONLINE, LOCALLY, OUT OF TOWN & PUT THEM TO USE

If you work for an employer, pull out your company handbook and read the “Education” or “Continuing Education” policy that outlines what is supported. Your employer may reimburse your tuition as long the knowledge gained can be used within the company and you earn a passing grade or certificate of completion.

Whether your company has a reimbursement policy or not – go for the education or training. If the company tells you training isn’t in the budget – go for the education or training anyway. Seek skill training for yourself because YOU are worth the investment and reinvention.

Classes can be found online, so you can learn nights, days, or weekends and at times convenient for you. Udemy has tons of courses and it’s amazing what you can learn via YouTube.

If you are seeking a hard skill that needs hands on training, research your local resources and ask every one you know (including your social media contacts) where training can be found.

Training center located out of town? Can you take vacation time or weekends to get the skill training you desire?

Remember to use your newly learned skill(s) on a daily basis. Practice, practice, practice. Ask a trusted coworker or advisor to give you feedback on your performance and keep you learning.

COLLABORATE & COOPERATE

If your company offers employee cross-training and mentoring take them up on it! Be willing to learn from your coworkers and cooperate with the system in place. If you see a way to improve the current system, let management know or put your idea in the Suggestion Box and keep learning, keep learning, keep learning.

Work alone?

Put the word out to all your contacts and the local community that you are seeking training. Contact career coaches and trainers and let them know what you are trying to learn and if they know where you can get training.

Find or start a group of skill seekers (different from Job Seekers) on LinkedIn and/or Facebook.

Start Brown Bag Seminars with local resources and individuals who are willing to offer skills training.

SEEK MASTERS AND ASK FOR COACHING

Find “masters” in your desired field of study and ask them for advice on how to get the skills training you need. Ask if they would be willing to coach you.

Have a definition of “coach” in mind and share your thoughts. Be able to articulate why you are seeking skill training and what you think you can learn from a “master.”

Be open to feedback. A master may recommend someone else. They may see you as needing other skill training in addition to or previous to gaining the skill you’re seeking.

Say, “Let me think about that.” Process and assess their assessment. Don’t quit if their opinion doesn’t match yours. Either accept their evaluation and work with them or move on and keep seeking. Perhaps that person wasn’t the “right fit” for you.

Employers: Invite masters (especially people who just recently mastered the advanced skills you would like your employees to learn) to come in and teach your staff. They are usually quite excited about what they’ve been taught and want to share. Reach out and go get it while the information is fresh in their minds.

I urge you to become a Master of Reinvention. Be mindful of your skills gap, fill it and stay relevant.

Last, but certainly not least, thank you Mr. Bowie and Mr. Rickman, for everything. Always.

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

The author of this blog does not presume to offer psychological therapy nor advocates the use of any technique for the treatment of any specific or traumatic psychological condition without the approval and guidance of a qualified psychotherapist. The writer’s intent is to convey personal experience in the hope it may be of help in others’ personal quests for mind, body and spirit improvement. If you use any of the information as a form of self-therapy, the author / writer assumes no responsibility or liability for your actions.

7 Scriptures to Ease Anxiety – These Aren’t the Usual Ones You See

Scriptures are powerful affirmations fashioned by God. Positive. Inspirational. Reassuring.

I understand that people mean well. However, when I began learning to calm and care for myself, the usually recommended scriptures that directly pertain to worry, anxiety and fear – commanding that we trust God – wasn’t always super effective.

Reminding an individual with an anxiety disorder that worrying is a lack of trust or faith in God just enhances the pain.

We try awfully hard to push away from pain which only makes the anxiety worse.

Here are the seven scriptures that eased my anxiety enough that I found (and still find) peace and hope. Combined with a program of deep breathing, prayers, meditation, therapy, mirror and chakra work I was transformed (and am still transforming) by accepting a different perspective on how to live.

“Be still, and know I am God” (Psalm 46:10 KJV)

How can you trust someone you don’t know?

How can you trust someone when you have a disheartening sense of who they are?

The God I was familiar with (based on my former religion) was embraced out of fear. Even though I could no longer agree with the teachings, a lingering fear grew and intensified.

If the Jehovah’s Witnesses were right and God was only found within their organization, I was seriously in the mother of all danger zones. I would never measure up or ever be able to work hard enough for God to love me.

Several years ago, with anxiety getting worse and nothing helping, feeling horribly sad and hopeless, I felt God’s hand on my shoulder.

I really did.

He touched my shoulder with a light pressure and a gentle voice in my head said, “Be still, and know I am God.”

From that moment forward I found time to “be still” (through meditation and prayer) and was guided to being willing to make an intensive study of and research MY truth about God.

This step took a lot of courage, as I was obsessively conditioned from the age of two by my parents and the Jehovah’s Witnesses to never ever read or rely on spiritual reading materials that did not originate from the Watch Tower Bible & Tract Society.

It felt like God had given me the keys to the kingdom as He gave me permission (I’ve now learned that I can give myself permission) to delve into exploring who He is so I could choose to have faith, hope and trust in Him and myself, which in turn, eased the anxiety.

I devoured the King James Version of the Bible and resources such as:

Our Daily Bread
“Jesus Calling” by Sarah Young
“The Promise” and “God Wants You Happy” by Father Jonathan Morris
“A Course in Miracles” by Helen Schucman & William Thetford
“The Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren
“Boundaries” by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
“The 4:8 Principle” by Tommy Newberry
“Moses” and “Elijah” by Bob Saffrin
“God on a Harley” by Joan Brady
“Not a Fan” by Kyle Idleman
Anything written by Max Lucado, Philip Yancey, Joyce Meyer, Louise Hay, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, Eckhart Tolle and much much more.

I discovered God loves me. He is patient, forgiving and filled with grace. He is perfect love.

I am not alone.

By diligently taking time every day to “be still,” connect with God, as well as the divine in me, with the help of the Holy Spirit I am able to break the bonds of anxiety with healthy, positive actions and behaviors.

“I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.” (Psalm 34:4 KJV)

Anxiety is experiencing discomfort and treating it like danger.

While learning to be “comfortable with being uncomfortable” this scripture soothed me because I knew fear didn’t have to control my life. Until I could do it for myself, a very powerful being could protect, transport and liberate me.

I repeated the Psalm 34:4 verse daily:

before bedtime
when I woke with the 2 a.m. terrors as my mind replayed events and projected future events
while driving in traffic where ill-mannered crazy drivers scared me.

“We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair” (2 Corinthians 4: 8 KJV)

Wow, so this is how people feel without an anxiety disorder! How awesome is that?

This scripture led me to trusting in a different perspective.

I could feel trouble, be perplexed and learn alternative methods for handling the anxiety.

Deep breathing until feelings pass.
Accepting “what if?” thoughts with a “Hum, interesting” and then focusing on present moment business or living.
Accepting second guessing my actions or words with a “Hum, interesting. I’ll see this as a good learning experience and handle it differently next time” and then focusing on present moment business or living.

I encourage you to spend time with a therapist or psychologist as they can give you specific methods for handling your particular anxieties.

Peace, hope, trust and present-moment living were also built by repeating the following scriptures. May they help you as much as they did me.

“And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7 KJV)

“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” (Isaiah 41:10 KJV)

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1 KJV)

“Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.” (Romans 15:13 KJV)

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Farewell 2015 No Regrets

Saying farewell to 2015 and hello to 2016, I am reminded of the popular words by Hunter S. Thompson in “The Proud Highway: Saga of a Desperate Southern Gentleman, 1955-1967,”

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”

“Totally worn out” was the only part of life’s journey I recognized. So this year I pedaled my tricycle as furiously as I could searching for what would make me skid in broadside to the grave knowing I’d thoroughly used up every gift and talent I possessed.

Why a tricycle?

It’s such a bright and happy symbol of laughter, freedom, and seeing the world through the eyes of a child. Fresh. Curious. Fearless.

Untainted by other people’s expectations, views, demands and values.

Wheeling over the driveway and onto the sidewalk ready to explore and choose my path with eyes wide open, a willing heart and a backpack chocked full of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, apples and a thermos of chocolate milk – 2015 was the year of questioning.

Children will persistently ask “Why?” much to an adult’s mind-boggling distraction.

Why puts us into a loop of eternal questioning. Asking how or what will let the brain figure out solutions.

So I could examine, then determine what I wanted to consciously believe, I asked:

“If I could start all over, become a child again, with all the influences I get to chose, what would my life be like and look like?”
“What beliefs block me from accepting that I get to make my own choices and my choices are valued?
“What beliefs block me from fully loving, accepting and valuing myself?”
“What made me believe that God hates me and is mad at me?”
“What do I choose to believe?”
“What do I chose to be?”

Often times an immediate answer was “I don’t know.” Remembering the child on the tricycle, I persisted in asking and never let up.

I have no regrets over spending time and energy on daily morning and evening prayer, meditation, mirror work, chakra work and homework from the therapist as I peeled back layers and layers of beliefs.

Like the child on the tricycle that veers off path, scraping knuckles and skinning knees, I cried, saw where I made less than life-enhancing choices, decided I could do better and pushed on refusing to give up my adventure.

In order to heal, I had to learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. And recognize when I was resisting being uncomfortable and letting the more familiar anxiety lead the way.

2015 started with gritted teeth, sobbing prayers of “Please God, give me the strength, courage and wisdom to get through this day.”

2015 is ending with smiles and excited prayers of “Thank you God, for showing me who you really are, that you are Love. Thank you for teaching me to love myself and heal my mind and thoughts. Thank you for teaching me that I get to choose my beliefs and no one, not even you can or will take that away from me. Thank you for helping me understand that you don’t hate me and aren’t mad at me, those obstructions came from listening to other people’s views. Thank you for unblocking my ability to accept my highest good and absorb the meaning of gratitude, grace, love, joy and peace. Thank you for an awesome day!”

May you too look back on 2015 with gratitude for people you love, grace and blessings received (even when they weren’t pleasurable), lessons learned even if they hurt and pursuing your dreams of what would make you skid in broadside to the grave.

That’s me, waving at you as we pass by on our tricycles heading to new adventures in 2016 with no regrets. I have a spare PB&J; let me know if you need it.

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Winter Affirmations

There’s No Place Like Home

Have you ever been stuck, trapped at an airport or on the road due to Mother Nature being a seriously wicked witch?

Been there.

Tried to make the best of it, tried to see it as an adventure, yet really, deep down inside all I could think about was getting home. Wishing for a pair of sparkly slippers. Click my heels three times and I am there!

Those times were bad enough, but not being able to find the home in my heart were the scariest and loneliest times.

The times when family, friends, new relationships, religion, food, jobs, success, money and the stuff that cluttered my house wasn’t enough to fill a sense of emptiness. A feeling of lack, hollowness, “missingness.”

The times when being me wasn’t enough.

Human nature abhors a vacuum.

The emptiness had to be filled and I was stuck and trapped when worry, anxiety and depression seeped in.

I wished for a pair of sparkly slippers. Click my heels three times and I am there.

Managing and transforming my anxiety disorder took more effort than wishing.

It was a long and winding road learning to trust God again and in turn to trust myself. To experience life without an abundance of worry, to increase my capability to know I am enough and can handle any set of circumstances.

If you’ve never experienced an anxiety disorder, think crisis. Think about how you feel during and immediately after a near brush with danger. The heart races, blood pounds, and your body trembles and shakes while your mind replays the incident.

You think about what might have happened and generally, after a bit of time, you move forward. Some people are able to shrug it off quickly and even laugh about it. Others dismiss it after a while and don’t bring it up again.

With an anxiety disorder, you do not get over it quickly, sometimes not at all. Your mind and body continues to replay the danger, looping it over and over until it begins to affect sleep, work, appetite, and relationships.

The definition of danger and crisis expands to encompass the “little things” in everyday life.

Disorders can be mild to extreme. Anything, and in some people’s cases I do mean ANYTHING, from a dog barking, to someone parking in their usual spot at work, to a simple comment from a family member, friend, coworker or employer are triggers.

As the anxiety reaction heightens, all we want to do is make it stop. Make the pain go away.

In distress, we can’t find home.

I encourage anyone with anxiety to get professional help.

I did not and do not take medication, if you need it, that is a personal choice.

It takes a lot of courage to face the fact that we cannot make it go away, we can only make it better. Trying to make it go away keeps it strong.

Accepting that it exists and can be neutralized weakens it and moves us forward.

Now, instead of feeling an earthquake of anxiety, I feel tremors and respond appropriately.

I mean really, if a bus is going to run me over, I’m getting out of the way, not going to do deep breathing exercises first.

AS THE TREMORS START HERE’S WHAT I DO

1. Use deep breathing techniques.

2. Say to myself, “Hum, interesting,” observing the situation instead of reacting.

3. Say a prayer asking and thanking the Divine for guidance and peace.

4. Stay in the present moment. My brain’s wiring will recall the pain and emotions from similar situations in the past and projections of future “what if’s.” This ingrained reaction can be controlled so old pain does not add to and take over what is occurring in the moment. The brain can be “re-wired” with practice.

5. Observe where I am at and what is the truth of the current situation. Am I truly in harm’s way? Am I projecting my feelings on someone else? Is this a real crisis or conflict?

6. Remind myself I cannot control another person’s actions or behaviors, only my own. By deep breathing, praying and observing, I stay calm enough to make life-enhancing choices about a situation. I can control my response, which could include not saying anything and letting it go or taking appropriate action. (If you do not know what an appropriate action is, relay the circumstances to your therapist or psychologist and ask for their suggestions.)

7. Ask myself, “If by worrying about this situation, am I avoiding looking at something else?” Are there conditions in my life I need to work on or address? Like relationships, being in an unsatisfying job, feelings of unworthiness, etc.

I learned to give myself permission and accept that it is okay to “self-care.” Finding the “missingness” of trusting God and myself did not happen overnight either. More about that in another blog.

Also do mirror work and journaling, use relaxation techniques, repeat positive affirmations and scriptures and work with my chakras and grounding. I keep myself open and receptive to learning more. I’ll share what I’ve learned with you in future blogs.

Without a pair of sparkly slippers or clicking my heels three times, I have learned to stabilize and find home in my heart.

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.

Flaw Season

You see the signs everywhere this time of year:

FLU SEASON – GET VACCINATED!

I’ve had some pretty gnarly life-threatening cases of flu, however, my health suffered just as much from the cumulative dis-ease during “Flaw Season.”

Flaw Season is how I label:

embracing and magnifying flaws and pushing strengths to the side.
too much focus on mending weaknesses instead of honoring and seeing my worth and power.
ignoring and refusing to evaluate habits that obstruct my good.
focusing on what I do not want instead of what I do want.

Without precautions, Flaw Season would have lasted a lifetime.

MIRROR WORK

Have you done mirror work? It is a wonderful preventative measure to combat Flaw Season and transform mind, body, and spirit health.

You begin by gazing into your eyes in a mirror and repeating the words, “I love and accept you exactly as you are,” as suggested by Louise Hay in her book You Can Heal Your Life.

At first looking into my eyes was too difficult, so I looked at my face.

An appalling lack of concentration plagued my early attempts.

“Oh man, look at that disgusting hair curling out my nose. Step away from the mirror and pluck that sucker out!”

“Hideous. I look hideous. Dark circles, puffy eyes, boy that lack of sleep is showing. I have back-to-back appointments today, can’t see people looking like this, and my hair! I’d have time to fix everything if I wasn’t staring into this mirror. I’m going to be late for work!”

“Wait. I think I missed a slide in that PowerPoint presentation. Did I? I can’t remember. The meeting’s tomorrow morning; I’ll have time to check it if I get to work early. (Yawn, yawn, yawn) I’m so tired and I’ve got so much to do! Gotta put this mirror down and get stuff done before bedtime.”

“Good heavens, is that another wrinkle? Look at all the wrinkles! This mirror work blows.”

And off my thoughts would go on a tear about getting older, the laundry, dinner, what was on Food Network, etc. etc. etc.

The whispers of divine intelligence must have felt like they were in a crowded bar with the band cranking tunes at 85 decibels or in the middle of a playground surrounded by screaming children.

Eventually with practice, I looked directly into my eyes, thoughts calmed and I heard my inner voice.

It told me what I was really thinking about loving and accepting myself.
It revealed what feelings and beliefs were blocking me from accepting and receiving my power.
It pointed out how centering on flaws was a flaw.

The act of writing down where the thoughts, feelings and beliefs came from illuminated what I needed to acknowledge and heal.

Journaling the mirror work led to transformation, as I made choices on what to believe and where to put my focus.

Journaling is a measurement tool.

Experiencing progress stimulates motivation to continue working. Seeing a mass of baby steps transforming and adding up to substantial breakthroughs is exciting.

Divine Intelligence opened the door to people, books, movies, blogs and resources that provided information when I needed help in processing and understanding how to move forward, learn more and make life-enhancing choices.

Mirror work was only the beginning, a pro-active injection to start shaking off the perpetual winter of the soul.

ABlueSquash.com is devoted to transformation and reinventing life. Topics and projects are wide and varied as inspiration is found around any corner anytime, anywhere.